Should women 'put some clothes on'?

“You know, I think we’re beating around the bush here. I’ve been told I’m not supposed to say this - however, women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimised.” That was the idea of a health and safety talk by Michael Sanguinetti; the infamous police officer from Toronto who believes men can’t control their lust if they happen upon a bit of flesh. I was watching Loose Women the other day (daytime TV at it’s best) and to my surprise at least half of the panel agreed with him! Arguments from the Loose Ladies in support of concerned Mr Sanguinetti included “if women are dressing in low cut tops and short skirts they are doing it to get attention from men” and “if a girl is straddling a man at a booth in a club with their tongue halfway down his throat then they are giving the impression that they want a sexual encounter”. Are they right? Should women be responsible for taking precautionary wardrobe choices so as to deter horny men? Should women put away their puppies and cover their pins instead of investing in rape alarms and pepper spray?

I think the first thing to note is that Mr Sanguinetti’s solution is offensive to both men and women. Referring to the way women dress, presumably in low cut tops and short skirts, as ‘sluttish’ is obviously discourteous, but its presupposition of men is more discreet. It indirectly implies that men are incapable of controlling their ‘pork swords’. This may have some truth in that they can have a life of their own and choose to stand to attention at the most inappropriate moments. Although it is a running joke that men are lead by their ‘Long John Silver’ I highly doubt it has so much control over them that it would lead them to walk the plank. In other words it is completely ludicrous and offensive to suggest that men cannot restrain themselves from sexually assaulting women due to the way they are dressed. I would hate to think that my boyfriend, my brother or my dad would even think about raping a woman just because they had a bit of flesh on show, let alone having to restrain themselves!

Before I continue I think we need to establish what Mr Sanguinetti means by dressing ‘like sluts’. I imagine he is referring to the standard form of dress you might find amongst young ladies on a Saturday night out - as realistically who, apart from me, actually dresses like this to go partying?

The photos below are of my friends and I dressed for a typical night on the town as a true representation of the kind of clothing Mr Sanguinetti thinks men find irresistible. Hopefully this will prevent you having to use your imagination too much. Granted, we look pretty fucking hot but are we dressed ‘like sluts?’ The Oxford Dictionary defines a slut as “a slovenly or promiscuous woman”; are we dressed ‘promiscuously?’ And how is it possible to dress ‘promiscuously’? How is it possible to dress like a person “having or characterised by many transient sexual relationships” or a person “demonstrating or implying an unselective approach” when it comes to men? You only have to watch The Jeremy Kyle Show to see that how you dress makes no difference to the amount of people you sleep with.

Mr Sanguinetti’s description also assumes that women dressed as we are in the photograph above are dressing to attract men. I had a little argument with my boyfriend about this, and he argued that it’s evolutionary - we get out our best assets out to attract men, so they can choose to breed with the most fertile women, hence men like big boobs, perky bums etc. I can see where he’s coming from, but I can’t help think that it is only a by-product of evolution and that it has become more complex than just attracting men. For example nowadays we have sex not only to reproduce - we have invented ways of stopping this process (condoms, the pill etc.) so that we can just have sex for pleasure. Of course there is an underlying reproductive intention, but sex has come to encompass so much more than that.

It’s the same with dressing ‘provocatively’. I’m not going to lie and say that women don’t ever dress to attract men, as some people do go ‘on the pull’, and popping in chicken-fillets to boost your cleavage and donning short skirts is one of the many tactics of the game. But dressing in such a way has come to encompass more than simply attracting men. The fact that all of the girls in the photograph, including myself, are all in serious relationships (indeed, all of the good ones are taken) must hold some testimony to the fact that women do not only wear skimpy dresses and skin tight leggings to attract men.

Believe it or not, women dressing ‘sexily’ also has the intention of attracting women! It’s all about desirability - we feel good when men are attracted to us just the same as we feel good when women look up to us and aspire to be like us. One way of making ourselves desirable is showing off our assets whether that means wearing skin-tight clothing that compliments our figures or push-up bras that boost our cleavage. It’s the same as how someone with money may buy a sports car; it shows off their worth to others and the person may feel good about the fact that other people would like to be as privileged as they are. It’s the same reason any person makes an effort with their appearance; the same reason people do their hair; the same reason women wear makeup; the same reason guys drink protein-shakes: to feel desirable to other people in order to feel good about themselves. I like to think that human beings are such complex creatures that attraction is not as basic as a means to reproduce.

If dressing a certain way makes someone feel good - and it isn’t harming anyone - they should be allowed to dress as they like. Dressing ‘like a slut’/sexy on a Saturday night is not harming anyone; women are not raped because of what they’re wearing. According to the 1991 Painter survey the most common perpetrators of rape in the UK are husbands and partners, and 97% of Rape Crisis Line’s callers knew their attacker, which goes some way to showing that women are not raped because of their attire. Rape is about power and humiliation, and (although I have no official information on this) I’m sure vulnerability probably has a lot to do with it. Women who are raped by their husbands and partners are generally, I assume, in abusive relationships and choose to stay because they have no one to turn to and fear for their lives. They are vulnerable women in vulnerable situations.

Let me ask you a question about a very typical scenario, one that I’ve seen on Crimewatch several times. It’s 1am and a sex attacker is loitering around a particular area on a Saturday night waiting for unsuspecting female prey. The attacker is aware of a few females that present themselves as opportunities: which of the following do you think he would be most likely to rape? (I’m sorry for the terribly crass nature of the question but it is the easiest way I can go about making a point). A) A group of student girls dressed in burlesque themed outfits, laughing and giggling on their way home from a good night or B) A female bar worker, wearing her standard uniform of black shirt and trousers, whose been allowed to leave early as the night is relatively quiet. You may dispute this, but I’d be inclined to say the barworker would be most vulnerable as she is alone and attackers very, very rarely attack women in groups. What if we added C) into the equation: one of the drunk burlesque students decides to stop to get a kebab while her friends, whose feet are hurting from their killer heels, decide to carry on the journey and agree to see her back at the flat. Out of the three options I would be inclined to say the kebab-stopping student would be most vulnerable not because of her ‘sluttish’ dress but because she is alone and drunk. Granted, the suspenders and stockings may be an added bonus but I do not believe for one second that her code of dress would swing it very much at all (except perhaps the fact that she’s wearing heels and therefore cannot run as fast).

As I write this I am beginning to think more and more that Mr Sanguinetti should probably hand me his job. Tactically covering up on a night out is not going to make us girls any safer; if a guy has set out to rape someone I highly doubt that ‘the sluttiest looking girl I can find’ is one of his search criterion and he is far more likely to concentrate upon traits such as ‘walking alone’, ‘looking physically weak’ and ‘intoxication’. What the police and other concerned agencies should be discouraging is women walking home alone at night and getting drunk out of their minds so as to prevent them from being easy targets. However, people who are making their way home alone from work or a night out are often put off paying for a taxi as the cost can equal an hours pay or another couple of drinks. Catching the bus has also become expensive, and in smaller cities they don’t tend to run late into the night. Maybe charities or the government should run a free or discounted taxi service for women and men who would otherwise be walking home alone whether it be from work or a night out. The service could be pre-booked, pick up points could be established and the taxi could pull up alongside vulnerable-looking individuals, who are already on the journey home, and ask them if they need a ride. Without going into the implementation of it too much, I think it could be done and would be far more effective than banning mini skirts and fishnets.

Another point of view by one of the Loose Ladies, Denise Robertson, was that girls who are acting like sluts I.e. straddling some guy in a club with her tongue half way down his gullet, should be accused of putting themselves in a vulnerable situation and not be surprised when the ‘inevitable’ happens. I can see her point; a woman who is acting in such a way, or even a woman who is merely flirting, may be sending out signals that suggest they are interested in a sexual encounter - and hey, that may be exactly what the girl is trying to achieve! But regardless of misleading signals the girl should be able to have the final say as to ‘how far’ things are going to go. If you decided you were going to donate your kidney, for example, you tell everyone you’re going to do it, you sign up for it, go through all of the applicable tests; every signal you send out indicates that you want to do it - and to start with you probably do. Then at last minute you get nervous about all of the repercussions it could have and you decide against it; that decision should be your own regardless of who it upsets. I can not emphasise enough the phrase that has come to embody the slutwalk protests and all they stand for; when it all comes down to it, no means no.

http://oxforddictionaries.com/view/entry/m_en_gb0783110#m_en_gb0783110 Accessed: 15/05/2011
http://oxforddictionaries.com/view/entry/m_en_gb0665860#m_en_gb0665860 Accessed: 15/05/2011
http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/Statistics2.php Accessed: 01/07/2011